A Salute to My Aunts

Originally Written Between 2017-2020                                             

 

As you all know, I write about my family a lot.  You may also all remember that I’ve written about my mom and dad and my grandparents many times, too.  And, on a few occasions, I’ve talked about my Aunt Bev.  Aunt Bev was married to my mom’s brother, Uncle Tom.  Tom and Bev died within three days of each in December of 2016 at the ages of 88 and 95 respectively.  

 

Aunt Bev was beautiful.  She was a model when she met my Uncle Tom.  Uncle Tom was very good looking and they made a handsome couple.  Bev adored the movie stars and felt a sort of kinship with the Gabor sisters – favoring Zsa Zsa the most.  Ironically, Zsa Zsa died just five days after my Aunt Bev at the age of 99.  The end of an era, I guess.

 

Since Bev and Tom had no children, my brother, Steve, and my sister, Joanne, and I were the recipients of wonderful and thoughtful gifts.  Only Aunt Bev would know that as a teenager, I would like make up and perfume for Christmas and my birthdays.  She would always bring her “famous” Pistachio Pudding to every holiday meal.  It was only about a year before her death that Bev finally gave me her recipe for the pudding.  And, I’ve made it every since!

 

So, I only had one Aunt on my mom’s side of the family.  My dad’s side was more prolific!  There were seven children in my dad’s family:  Dad was the oldest, followed by Uncle Al, Uncle Walter, Aunt Irma – or as I knew her – Sister Walter, Aunt Vera, Aunt Flo, and Uncle Leo.

 

I only met my Aunt Vera and Aunt Flo a couple of times – probably because they lived in New Jersey and Florida.  So, I don’t have any memories of them.  Now, Sister Walter is another matter.  I so admired her.  She was a nun, after all!  She’d give me holy cards, prayer books, and little medals whenever she came to visit.  I liked her. But, I didn’t have any fun with her.  Truthfully, I was a little scared of her! 

 

But, boy did I have fun with my Aunt Jeanette and Aunt Anita.  They were married to my dad’s brothers, Leo and Walter.  One couple lived in Mahtomedi and the other lived in St. Paul Park.  So, they were fairly close to us in Forest Lake.  The three couples were together all the time.  It didn’t have to be a holiday or a birthday.  It just had to be a day when they could all get together.

 

Aunt Jeanette worked downtown St. Paul in a doctor’s office.  She “graduated” from running the office to being a nurse – even though she did not go to nursing school.  She just learned from watching the other nurses.  I remember when I was six years old and I had to get a shot in order to go to first grade.  Aunt Jeannette gave me the shot and for the first time – I didn’t cry.  Aunt Jeannette was so proud of me – which made me proud of me.

 

After our doctor appointment, mom would always take us – and Aunt Jeannette – out for lunch at the River Room in Dayton’s department store.  What a classy restaurant!  I felt so grown up.

 

Now, Aunt Anita was an elementary teacher.  She taught every grade in her long career.  Her specialty was actually in biology and all things living in the wild.  She loved to put on “game feeds” with venison, pheasant, duck, and other animals.  Her husband – my Uncle Walter – was a chef and owned his own restaurant.  So, between the two of them, we had some fantastic meals!

 

To say that my aunts were “characters” would be an understatement.  I remember one year when Aunt Anita was hired to teach a class of slow-learning grade school students.  The next week after her hire, the local newspaper declared the following headline on the front page:  “Mentally Retarded Teacher Hired!”   

 

I’d like to share with you a story that has been passed down throughout the years.  One year, the three Vogel couples decided that they should rent a houseboat for a couple of days and float down the St. Croix River.  Every one had an assignment according to their skill level:

 

The captain of the boat, of course, was my dad – because it was his idea and he had a captain’s hat and since he owned a pontoon boat, he knew how to steer!

 

My mom was designated the “Activity Director” since she ran the roller rink and came up with all sorts of games for everyone.

 

Aunt Jeannette was the “nurse” – or “Chief Medical Officer” – as she liked to be called.

 

Aunt Anita became the “Local Guide” for when they docked the houseboat and ventured out into the woods.

 

Uncle Leo was the bartender – like I said – everyone had a skill!

 

Uncle Walter was the cook – and everyone else had to do the dishes!

 

They had a wonderful Day One.  Fishing.  Swimming.  Drinking.  Eating.  Day Two was uneventful until the late afternoon.  They were all fishing when all of a sudden, my mom really hooked a big one!  Uncle Walter!  It seems she was practicing her fly fishing and the hook landed in Uncle Walter’s back side!  

 

Leo, the bartender, came forward to properly anesthetize the injured and Jeanette,  

the Chief Medical Officer, then came to the rescue.  With her trusty pliers and the ointment and bandaids in her first aid kit, she guaranteed Uncle Walter that he would not have to go to the hospital!  

 

Versions of this episode have circulated throughout the years – each year getting funnier and funnier.  So much so that I’m not even sure it happened!  But – I’ve been assured by all present that it, indeed, happened, and Uncle Walter has the scar to prove it.  I just haven’t been allowed to see it.